KYN's Guide to Living With A Loved One With Dementia

At KYN, we know firsthand the difficulties families face in adjusting when a loved one is diagnosed with dementia. Their emerging care needs profoundly impact families and relationships.

While these changes can be uncertain, loving companionship along the journey can make daily life feel more manageable. We advise families on thoughtful ways to adapt living environments and care approaches to continue treasuring time with their loved ones in mutually fulfilling ways.

Assisting a loved one to live well with dementia can be difficult - in many cases, it is often in the person’s best interests to help them move somewhere with round-the-clock, specialist dementia care. However, to live well, it’s important that people with dementia are treated with the utmost respect, and their needs are catered for in such a way that still allows them to live as independently as possible.

If you do choose to care for someone with dementia at home, then it’s extremely important that you take the time to really consider what it means to live well with dementia, and take the necessary steps to protect their wellbeing, individuality and your own health.

Understand What it Means to Live Well With Dementia 

Supporting a loved one to live well with dementia requires understanding their changing needs and capabilities. It means nurturing their dignity through each phase of the illness.

We advise learning about the specific type of dementia your loved one faces so you can anticipate coming changes in cognition, behaviour and physical function. This allows you to implement appropriate home modifications, care approaches and activities ahead of emerging needs. It also helps you understand their experiences so you can empathise better.

Living well also means supporting your loved one’s participation in daily home life at their current level for as long as possible. Break down tasks into simple steps and provide tactile or visual guides. Focus on retaining life skills they still possess before assuming dependence. Adapt your methods to reveal their perceived strengths.

Understand the Type of Dementia Your Loved One is Living With:

The most common forms of dementia have distinct symptom patterns over their course which can help guide care plans. Learn key features of your loved one’s diagnosis.

Alzheimer’s Disease often begins with short-term memory gaps before progressing to confusion performing familiar tasks. Visual-spatial skills weaken later, affecting driving abilities. As the illness advances, mood changes like apathy, anxiety or agitation emerge along with physical declines.

Vascular Dementia stems from impaired blood flow depriving brain tissue of oxygen. Symptoms follow the location of tissue damage and may fluctuate. It often impairs decision-making, planning and self-care while leaving memory relatively spared early on. Later stages affect mobility through unsteady gaits or paralysis.

Dementia with Lewy Bodies has early effects on attention, alertness and visual perception. Sleep disorders, movement issues like tremors or rigidity and delirium-like hallucinations are common. Severe sensitivity reactions to antipsychotics and rapid cognitive shifts also occur. These patterns help you plan supports as abilities evolve.

Understanding common behaviours prepares you to respond with insight when challenges arise. Your empathy eases your loved one’s sense of loss.

Adapting Your Home Environment

The first change you’ll need to consider is the home setup. As dementia progresses, once familiar spaces can become confusing for your loved one. But by modifying elements in the home to maximise safety and accessibility, you can help your loved one sustain independent functioning.

• Improve lighting throughout the home to reduce fall risks. Consider installing night lights in hallways and using contrasting colours on the edges of stairs or furniture.
• Remove clutter and rearrange furniture to open walkways to eliminate tripping and bumping hazards.
• Add handrails and ramps to improve your loved one’s stability in bathrooms, stairs, and entrances to prevent slipping accidents. Also use slip-resistant rugs.
• Place clear, simple signage on doors or cabinets that label rooms and contents.
• Keep items your loved one frequently needs prominently in the same places. Use pictures or colour cues to help them locate the items.

To make the adjustments feel organic, try to anticipate your loved one’s needs before they become urgent. It reinforces their confidence if the existing home is gradually adapted into a supportive space.

Adjusting Your Communication Approaches

Dementia affects verbal abilities, comprehension and memory, so adjusting your communication style to your loved one's capabilities is important to preserve a meaningful connection.

• Make eye contact first before speaking to focus their attention. Speak slowly in short sentences and allow plenty of time for responses.
• Ask simple yes/no or choice questions rather than open-ended inquiries that require retrieval.
• Repeat summaries of key points by using concise phrases, images or written keywords as reminders.
• Avoid criticising or correcting your loved one. Instead, respond more to their feelings than facts and offer reassurance whenever they feel uncertain or frustrated.
• Encourage nonverbal expression through touch, music, art, or working together on an activity. Make sure to meet them at their current level of interaction.

With creativity and empathy, families can find new ways to share thoughts, laughter and closeness adapted to their evolving verbal capacity.

Building Supports into Daily Routines

Maintaining a familiar routine reduces stress while adding helpful structure. Integrating cues, reminders and assistance into your loved one’s daily flow supports independence.

• Follow consistent morning and bedtime rituals. A checklist prompting which steps to complete in which order can be beneficial.
• Set out clothes, food items and activity supplies in sequence to further promote independence.
• Use labels, signs or alarms to remind your loved one about key times for meals, medications or events.
• Accompany your loved one on walks or errands, offering arm support if they need it.
• Asking your loved one to help with household tasks adapted to their abilities, like folding laundry or watering plants can help give them purpose, helping them to feel useful around the home.

Adapt your expectations and work together to create shared routines that support each other.

Staying Socially Engaged

Preserving community connections and social stimulation is vital for your and your loved one’s mood and cognition. Seek social opportunities that fit your loved one’s current abilities.

• Attend support groups together to share your experiences with other caregivers and families.
• Visit uplifting locations like gardens, museums or spiritual settings, adapting the frequency and duration of your visits to your loved one’s abilities.
• Get together with familiar friends who interact warmly and simply. Participate in simple activities like reminiscing over photo albums.
• Encourage interactions with children, such as visits from grandchildren or great-grandchildren, as these intergenerational connections can be beneficial and enjoyable for individuals living with dementia.
• Arrange for home visits if getting out becomes difficult. Vary the activities to maintain your loved one’s interest.

Connecting with others at their level fosters tiny sparks of happiness, even in difficult times.

Look After Your Health Too

Caregiving exerts physical and emotional demands that can drain family member’s resources over time. Attending check-ups, maintaining social outlets and taking respite breaks prevents fatigue and sustains your ability to continue to provide care.

Schedule regular medical visits to address emerging health issues early, especially if you have any underlying conditions. Chronic stress impacts blood pressure, blood sugar and immunity so monitor warning signs. Join a caregiver support group to share coping strategies with others facing similar challenges.

Block out periods for maintaining hobbies, exercising or relaxing to regularly refuel. Recruit family or friends to provide care coverage so you can take rejuvenating breaks. Seek part-time home assistance if full-time caregiver becomes unsustainable for your household. Setting care limits ensures your loved one benefits from your positive presence.

How to Help Someone with Dementia Sleep

Disturbed sleep is common for individuals living with dementia due to biological shifts and disorientation at night. Ensuring daytime activity, comfortable bedding and nightly rituals improves restorative rest.

Keep your loved one engaged in physical and mental activity during daytime hours to reinforce the body’s sleep/wake cycle. Schedule vigorous exercise early while limiting naps. Dim lights in the evening to boost melatonin production.

Make sure mattresses and pillows are supportive without aggravating joint pains. Use nightlights and minimise noises or music that could interrupt sleep. Assist with bathroom visits to limit night time disorientation. Establish an evening routine with familiar, soothing activities leading up to bedtime.

Where to Get Dementia Support

Caring for someone with dementia introduces evolving emotional and practical demands. Seeking guidance from community resources and professional services offers helpful direction along your journey:

Dementia UK

Dementia UK is a dementia nursing charity that provides free support and advice to anyone affected by dementia. Their nurses, known as Admiral Nurses, work across various settings, including the community and care homes. They offer practical and emotional support to families, helping them with the difficulties of dementia.

The Alzheimer's Society

The Alzheimer's Society is a UK dementia charity that provides a wide range of free services, including the Dementia Support line and online resources such as the Talking Point forum. They also offer personalised information, support, and advice to those affected by dementia.

The NHS

The NHS recognises the emotional impact of caring for someone living with dementia. People caring for someone living with dementia may benefit from counselling or talking therapies, which are available through the NHS. You can discuss this with your GP or self-refer to a talking therapies service. By accessing the support offered by these charities and the NHS, you can ensure that you and your loved one receive the necessary guidance and assistance.

When Home Care Reaches Limits

Despite your best efforts to adapt, full-time residential dementia care can become the most supportive option for your loved one living with dementia. While it can be emotional, you’re assured your loved one is receiving personalised care in an uplifting environment.

Make a Home With KYN

KYN's welcoming dementia care homes provide person-centred support so individuals living with dementia are fully supported. Our expertise and evidence-based programming enrich the mind and body. If your family is considering living alternatives, contact KYN at +44 (0) 20 3535 1923 or email enquiries@kyn.co.uk. We make transitions positive through steady compassion.